Sunday, January 18, 2009

Bits and pieces

I never imagined that junk food and diet coke is a recipe for poetry (uh huh ...if you can call it that). I had gone to pick my friend up from the airport and I was talking a bit too much. And griped that I find a lot of people irritating. She promptly replied that she finds me irritating as well. Fair enough. But that somehow struck a chord...or perhaps it was the above mentioned junk food and coke. Anyhow, out came some Keats style romantic crap....(I do need to get back and finish this)
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(if you do read this, read this out loud with the pauses in the right places as indicated :-) )

Ice Princess

Talking king 's/ what I am /my Ice princess,
Talk'd too much /sure I did /Ice princess,
Listen to me /but will who /Ice princess,
Like you did /listen to me /my Ice princess

In the dark /starry skies /O Ice princess,
In the deep /stormy seas /O Ice princess,
In the high /mountain peaks /O Ice princess,
I see your /perfect face /dear Ice princess

You were /an illusion /my Ice princess,
Were you but /in flesh and blood /Ice princess,
Love you for /'ever I will /dear Ice princess

In my dull /boring life /Ice princess,
You were /a lighting bolt /Ice princess,
Gone in /an eye-lid flash /Ice princess,
Memories /are all I got /my Ice princess

Eyes you had /full of love /Ice princess,
Thorns in path /many u saw /O Ice princess,
Heart you had /cold as gold /Ice princess,
Off you went /with no tears /my Ice princess

Defenseless /in love was I /O Ice princess,
Heart I did /lose for sure /Ice princess,
Soul I did /give with love /my Ice princess,
Joy /was the hurt I felt /dear Ice princess

Dancing queen 's /what you were /my Ice princess,
Much too much /moves you had /Ice princess,
Amazed by you /will be who/O Ice princess,
Amazed by 'ur /grace like me /my Ice princess

Words /are /all
I have /for /u
My /Ice /princess

(depending on how you want it to end)

Words that /don't count for sure /my Ice princess,
One question /I ask of thee /my Ice princess,
If I die /this moment /my Ice princess
A tear will u /shed for me /my Ice princess?

*sniff sniff sniff*

(or)

Write I do /crap for sure /Ice princess
Damn I don't /give for you /Ice princess
Words are /but words only /Ice princess
Craze I do /feel for none /dumb Ice princess!

*ha ha ha*
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You and Me (To be written)
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God is Great (To be written)
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Desi Dhal Makhani (To be written)
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Friday, January 2, 2009

As it happens

"Yes, we had to let people go. But, we value you. We want you to take on more responsibilities"... It happened so fast. Just like that nearly half my team was gone. I had survived. We design chips for digital cameras. I am pretty good at it.

But it did throw me off guard. I had been living a rather idyllic life. Today morning I was annoyed that I wasn't able to get a page counter setup. In hindsight I was bitching about something trivial when people were asked to go home. I had kissed enough asses to keep myself safe.

Evening, I went to the ocean front. I was still preoccupied. Some of those laid off had families. On H1B one has no security. I wonder why anyone should work like this..beats me. As for me, I would get my green card in a couple of months. Not that I am ecstatic about it. Just offers a person a greater security. The caress of the easterly wind was rather soothing. Brought memories of the beach back home.

Mom loved the beach. She always said she could stay there forever looking at the waves. An involuntary lump forms in my throat. Have I been a good son? I have left my aging parents back home. In pursuit of what? Has it been worth it? I have worked my butt off, my paycheck makes me smile. But deep down a longing persists.

Still feeling rather heavy, I go to the Blockbuster. I quickly blow 15 bucks on three movies I had always wanted to see - "Pursuit of Happyness", "Bucket List" and the "Dark Knight".

"Help a stranger for common good" - How appropriate. Checking my email, I found that someone did try to help me setup the page counter. It lightened my mood. And she was really sweet. :-) I suddenly feel all the more cheesy for all my solicitations on random blogs to leave me comments. If someone wants to leave me a note they will. I also shut down my wordpress blog. Two blogs are like two wives. I realize that it is enough if I write what I want to write.

If I were to add to the bucket list I would add - "Make those who love you, feel loved". Will I ever truly fulfill that?

I don't let up after the Bucket List. Will Smith's kid in "Pursuit of Happyness" reminds me how much I love kids. One day I will have a daughter. But...not yet. not yet. I need to finish my pursuit. I always thought that term Coelho(personal legend) uses was cheesy while reading the Alchemist. May be it is just our difficulty in acknowledging its existence that is cheesy. Somewhere in the middle of watching Will Smith struggle, a vision of my pursuit crystallizes.....and it is not here in this land. Not between the Pacific and the Atlantic. It will be back there in the peninsula. The only place I can truly call home.

This means I have to continue being a bad son for a while more.... even if I am running short of excuses to avoid marriage ;-)